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Sunday, March 06, 2011

Remember me as the only one who sets you free
Maybe time alone will make you see
How deep our love could be

Monday, February 28, 2011

FABFAD

Lately, my studies have been affected.
My mood have been affected.
My relationship have in turned, been affected.
Alongside with several other issues, my world's upside down.
And no one person can truly understand the pain that I am going through now.


Now that things have reached this state, there is no point in me trying to protect any of our interests anymore. Because I am so tired. So tired of all these shits I just want to leave these all behind and move on to things I ought to do and focus on right now instead.
As many of you know, I have been modelling for Fabfad for awhile now and I'm here to say that Fabfad and myself will no longer and will never be affiliated in any other way from now on.


Issues started surfacing early this year when I found out that I have been way underpaid compared to the industry's market rate. I naively believed them right from Day 1 and accepted my initial pay of $12/hr.
Early this year, I found out that the minimum ought to be $30/hr and just couple of days ago, I understood from my cousin who used to have his own studio that for non-professional models, minimum's at $40/hr and professional models can be $80-$300/hr. If payment's on per session basis, I ought to get $120-$150.


Indefinitely, I raised my concerns. & thereafter, they revised a rate of $40/hr.
Here's where the dispute is. I have made a mistake in naively believing them and I deleted their sms a week before I went for the outdoor shoot just last Monday. Shoot started at 3 and ended at 6. But the photographer mentioned we did a 2.5hr shoot. Alright, I didn't want to argue over a 30mins thingy. The highlight was, I was then paid $40 in total. When I briefly questioned, the owner answered me that she thought she had made it clear to me that she would pay me $40/session? I was loss for words and as much as I wanted to argue, I swallowed back.
Reason being, I remembered showing Jiayuan and Yiye her sms during class one morning.
I had no intention of jumping into any conclusion, daddy always taught me to always look back at yourself before criticising people. So I wanted to get home and check with them what they read. Did I really read wrongly or did all of us read wrongly which is definitely fishy.
Both could not remember the exact content that they read but they were very sure that they did not read anything about $40/session. I even showed boyfriend but I didn't bring him into the picture as "own people" would definitely stand up for you.


When I decided that Fabfad was clearly twisting their words and dishonest, my one and only decision was to quit as I didn't see a single bit of integrity at all. Lying obliviously with their eyes wide open.

Did I mention at the outdoor shoot, I travelled all the way to Woodlands, just to earn $40. On top of that, I carelessly got myself a $30 summon and thus earning $10 for that shoot? Which probably wasn't even enough to cover for my petrol.
But I was willing to forgo all of these and just walk away. I didn't want to pursue the matter. My mentality was, if you want to eat me, alright. I'll just take it as a lesson learnt. I was going to let the matter rest without even confronting them.


What turned things ugly was, she wasn't pecked by a single bit of guilt. On top of that, she said I accused her. She then forwarded me the sms that she sent me the other time. But instead of $40/hr, it was $40/session. So I asked if that was the original copy that she sent me. If it was, I would go look for her. Recipient, date, time and message content would all be there. Evidence speaks more than merely words against words. But she said that was the exact msg she sent me after she sent to her girlfriend for proof-read. Cmon, you don't have the original message anymore, what proves that the message wasn't altered?


I am 99.999% sure that what I received was $40/hr.
I have my recollections but there's no point in me saying here as I do not have any evidence as well.
I called Starhub to ask if I could have my past sms contents. But they said no, as expected. The investigations department would only retrieve it for you if there is legal pursuit or, any criminal cases needed by the police for investigations.
But I later on found out that there are certain computer shops and hp shops that are able to retrieve deleted sms-es.
I told her, that since she wants to say I accused her, and my conscience is clear, I will find ways and means to get my sms retrieved.
IF it was overlook on my part, I would give her all due respects she deserve and apologise to her right infront of her and everyone else.
But what if I was right all these while? ........


Hence, I have been so caught up trying to find my saviour.
I know the time and cost would probably not be worth all of these pay shit at the end of the day but that wasn't my point anymore.
It wasn't a matter of money but principles now.
I was determined to clear my name and lay the truths all out right infront of us so we don't have to go round with all these arguments.
How can I possibly swallow all of these when I'm the one being cheated her and yet I didn't want to pursue the matter and you have the cheek to say I accused you?!


At the end of the day right now, my efforts have been futile.
And I give up.
They must be laughing their heads off at my plight.
They must see me as a fool now.


Everything aside.
An outdoor shoot for 3hrs. $40. Spread this to people in this industry. This must be a joke right?
Whether I find evidence against them or not, I am not at the losing end.
$40 for a 3hrs outdoor shoot?
Anyone will tell you that's pure exploitation and cheats.
如果头没有这么大,就不要带这么大的帽子。


Whoever is their next model, well I wish her luck and wisdom to not be as naive as I was.
With such lowly underhand dirty tricks, I'm sure they wouldn't go far.
If I can't deal with them, I'll let heaven do it. I'm a strong believer of Karma.
人在做,天在看。



I do not deny that I'm feeling very lousy at this point.
Suddenly, I ask myself why did I fight so hard to only find myself back at 原点?
I didn't even want this in the first place. But I found it really hard to swallow down the words that she feels accused.
It wasn't even easy for me to make these decisions.
I have sacrificed days of peaceful sleep, I sacrificed my concentration and focus to study. All for principle, and to "tao hui yi ge gong dao".


On top of all of these difficult decisions I had made, I don't even have the support of my boyfriend.
Some say I should not let them off so easily.
Some say I should just let it go, they will get their deserts.
He, unfortunately, belongs to the latter.

I do not ride on a high horse, but I do have pride to some extent to uphold my integrity and conscience. There is no way I can let it go when that was my exact intention but they turn back and say they feel accused.
Sad but true, he doesn't understand the unjustice and pain in me enough.


Without my pillar of support, that's half my battle lost.
And this pain, will never be comparable to the pain I learnt in this lesson.


I'm done here.

And if you would excuse me, I would like to be left alone for awhile.



Rin

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Today, Yuanny & I had a little shopping date. Followed by dinner together with Fishy after her work. (:


Purpose of this shopping date was for us to buy shorts.
Got what I wanted! On top of that, got many other stuffs which I didn't plan to buy too. & everything I bought today, yuanny bought a piece too. Hahaha. So gonna be twins soon.
My buys for today:

  • 1 pair of faded denim shorts
  • 1 pair of wedges
  • 1 superbly fit black dress (As if it was made just for me. Haha! Awesome!)
  • 2 cheerleading-like skirts
  • 3 blings strap.

Hohoho.
That's kinda a record for a shopping trip. I've never managed to find so many stuff that fits and cheap every single time I plan for a shopping trip.
I always end up not being able to find what I want.
Today was a fruitful day!


And today marks a day I finally found a pair of heels that doesn't hurt a single bit and doesn't give me any blisters. Woo hoo.
Yuanny and I got a pair each and changed into it immediately.
I shopped the entire day in them and walked everywhere and my feets' are in perfect condition as they were before I left my house this afternoon. YAYS!
When daddy saw me coming home, his face had a slight smile as he stared at my feet. Hahaha. I bet he's very pleased with my buy today.
He has preached before that I should go get a pair of comfortable heels that wouldn't hurt and have a little more class instead of going everywhere in mah havaianas which he claims is lianish. Hahaha! & I always have to rebutt and remind him how much my havaianas is. They are atas slippers can. xD Mah cute daddy. X)

As for why I got 3 blings, they are gifts! One for myself, one for yuanny and one for fishy!
But of course! My two lovelies and prolly one of the nicest ladies on earth... (((:


Dinner at Swensen's, updates, gossips, jokes, and it was home sweet home!



The 3 blings! ;D




After dinner, we all put on our blings. Hohoho.
So prettay.
Got the girls their favourite colours. ((:




Our pretty wedges. ^.^




Earthquake treat by Yuanny!
Shank euu dear. ♥




Pretty Yuanny & I.
Totally love her hair, don't you love it too? ;)




Yuanny & Fishy




Fishy & I




And so I end off my post.
A day I truly deserved and needed.

Now now, how do I get the momentum back? Time is running out so bad. =(



♥ xoxo,
Rin

Monday, February 21, 2011

All the good is as glass

Never behave like every one else is at your feet if you're not up to it.

B'cus there comes a day when you crumble and fall,
leaving you to pick up the pieces you yourself tore.


Sometimes, what seems like the right thing to do may not always be right.
What seems like the wrong thing to do may be afterall, right.


All I was trying to say was,
Judgement fails.


More than often,
help rendered are never appreciated.
As much as this is going to sound selfish and self-centered, nevertheless, realistic: -
"Mind your own beeswax".

You never know what unnecessary trouble you're getting into.


It's high time I learnt how to freeze the lil red beating on the left.


I've had enough of all these shits.
I've had enough of getting myself busy and tired at the expense of others.
I've had enough of helping yet landing myself with more shits, none of which concerns me to begin with.

Not that I expect anything in return at all, but if this is what I'm gonna get at the end of it, then I'm sorry, once bitten twice shy.

To be exact, it's not even the first.


So to those of you who ever since has stepped and existed and turned my life upside down,
just scram on your own.
That's my very honest and nice plea, without me asking you to "fuck off" on your face.


As far as I'm concerned, I'm no longer your sweet lil princess if you've crossed the line. & I, will not hesitate a verbal slap. Try me.



Signing off,
On how we take the good for granted.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

I had a friend, a really nice friend.


And then time begins to tick,
and the ugly head shows.


Not knowing why, but slowly and sure,
our world shifts and shimmers and splits.


Shattered shards cascade down,
spurred by angry, lashing words.


The scars run deep,
jagged cleft in my soul.


So you moved on and I remain.
We keep on living with the distance drifting.


Now there's an enclosure around you,
I dare not come near.


I used to think I would hop in,
if you would only let me in.


But with today the words I speak,
what we had once we can never have again.


I will never allow myself to,
for I cannot trust a single word you say.


I had a friend, a really nice friend.
A friend that was no friend at all.




So I say to you Goodbye,
Rin

Monday, February 14, 2011

Happy ♥-Is-In-The-Air Day!

I've got the simplest affair ever because I wanted it so.


Last week, the king initially suggested bringing me to eat expensive stuff at expensive places.
But I was against all his suggestions simply because I thought the food's expensive and quality isn't worth it at all. Then he joked to go to Hawker Centre which I cross my heart and swear even if we ended up at a hawker, I wouldn't mind at all.
To me, with just his being and presence beside me on such a special day, that's all that really matters. ((:


So we headed to our fave Fishhead steamboat place and bloated ourselves mad with just the steamboat and 2 other dishes. Thankfully I was smart enough to stop him from ordering the 3rd. LOL.


I wasn't actually anticipating for anything because we both are really a very realistic couple who don't believe in extravagance but reality. We don't exchange gifts on anniversaries and days like today or even to the extend of birthdays if we both don't need anything. Instead, if there's anything we like, we'll just take turns to get for each other on any other day.
He's awfully lucky I'm not the kind of girl who'll kick up a huge hoo haa if I don't receive gifts or surprises. Hor Baybee? Hahaha!
"Self praise's no praise man." =p


So anyway! The King's awfully sweet that he did actually get me something!
Flowers that will never ever wither!!!

Truth is, I've always told him how he don't have to bother buying me flowers cause I never used to like flowers. I thought they were expensive and a waste of money because they wither and die within days. & there goes the man's $$$. Kaching! T_T
See what I mean.. Like I mentioned earlier, I'm pretty much a realistic girl. Hahaha. =X

But maybe it's the age or something, I don't know? Somehow, this year I had this little hope etched in a small part of me to receive some flowers. Nobody knew of course.
& coincidentally! My realistic King decided to get me flowers that will never wither. It's my first bouquet from him and I get to keep it with me forever!!! Hohoho!
A lil surprised and happy maximums! :D :D :D



That's my pretty flowers with colours I adore.
Baby picked the right colours! :*



When the LED lights are turned on. x)
From my daddy's reaction when I came home and showed off my flowers, I bet he thinks it's pretty too! Hahaha! =X



Happy silly me. :D



Check the grin on my face when Baby turned on the LED lights for me.
:D



Thank you Baby P for everything tonight. I appreciate everything.
Needless to say, "I Love You!"
Bery berries berrily much! ♥



♥ xoxo,
Rin

Sunday, February 13, 2011

How was your weekend?
I had a pretty good one. ;)


Friday night,
Ric, Peggy, Lionel, King & myself met up somewhere around Bugis Iluma.
While they were brainstorming on our plans for the night, I went over to I ♥ Taimei to get my first cup of Bubble Milk Tea because there's no such thing as Honey Green Tea there. *wails* ~>.<~
Whatever it is, I could make do with milk tea to satisfy the bubble tea craving. ;D
Wonders of greed+desperation. I hear snickers already. Lol!
If you're thinking why I didn't go for Koi instead, let's just say imho, Koi's overated. *shrugs*
No offence Koi fans. =\


Headed to Serangoon Garden K Garden thereafter. Fortunately there was a room available in 30mins. It was a K Friday night for all of us.
As usual, once the King starts dedicating songs, the entire playlist from then would be his and the boys', leaving Peggy & I listening to em instead. But it was all good because Peggy the fishy & I had that awesome chance to have a heart to heart talk. ♥
Been awhile since I found someone matured enough to share such conversations with. Noticed I said matured; Literally age related. Not that my fishy's old. But somehow of late, people I've met are all late 80s or even 90s. It's a very saddening situation. Even Yuan Yuan's born in 1989.
Someone just tell me that I'm age-ing and hitting my quarter-life crisis soon. =O
Oh, have I said it yet? "Fishy's da best!" xD

Right. End of Friday.


My Saturday was basically me, clad in my Miffy-inspired dress, stuck in my King's Royal Room watching "Who am I? That's one secret I'll never tell.. You know you love me. Xoxo, Gossip Girl."
How many of you reading my little space's having the familiar bell ringing in your ear? LOL.
I'm still stuck in Season 1 since forever simply because time doesn't allow me the luxury to just chill and watch shows at home. Considering the prelims are in 3 weeks time and finals in less than 3 months time. Oh my gawd, I'm feeling the sweat on my palms already. =S


After an entire noon of Gossip Girl, King & I finally head out to meet Ric and Peggy the fishy again. It was a double date for 大世界 at AMK Hub! I enjoyed the show although I was feeling a little pissy with King the Irritating. =X Way better than 笑着回家 okay!
After the show, we headed to Marina Square Hong Kong Cafe for supper.
Before we left, look whose chio ride's parked beside Ric's.



Mercedes Benz E Class Cabrio Soft Top.
Chio MAXIMUMS!!!
It spells class and sporty. What perfect combination.
& you know what's the best of all? De Interior Red Leather Seats.
Do you know, that I'll just die for red leather seats?
Oh my gawwd.



Thankfully I wasn't spotted taking the car. The owner came in less than 5mins. o.O
Heng ga lau sai! =X


And here's what I found online: -



A zhng-ed one. (Overseas of course)
Prettayyy! :D



Alright, nuff said bout the Benzy.
Let's continue with the peektures of my Saturday night shall we..



The man who irritated me so much that night but I still ♥ him!
*Grin*



When the pic is giving too much attention to the red...



We gotta be equal and give more attention to the black too.
:D



That's my Fishy Ng!
I love this shot thou i kinda "cut" myself off abit all thanks to my great with open inverted commas photo-taking skills. =X
Love the smiles!
((:



That's Peggy, Ric & his 'Spoon'.
Hahaha! ;D



With Mr Reddy & My King.
Oh, and that's my Miffy-inspired dress btw.
Hahaha! =p


Oogay!
End of my weekend updates.


No monday blues tomorrow because it's ♥-is-in-the-air Day!!!
I get to go on dinner date with mah king! Yayness.
I loveeeee my Mr TKP aka Pengy aka King!
Times spent with him are never enough. xD


Not only have I got wishes from the king,
Mr Moron (Hahaha! I doubt he'll be reading this anyway.) and Uncle Yong surprisingly wished me too! Such sweet pals!
Not forgetting Annoying Lim who though have been MIA, but just wrote on my wall wishing me Happy vday. Awwww.
Why thank you, you guys just made my day! :D


To all the couples out there, I hope you guys have the loveliest time together!

As for the singles, Valentine's Day's Bestie's Day too! Share the love with your best friends or people whom you love.


Because LOVE IS IN THE AIR!





Spread the loveeeeee guys!!!



♥xoxo,
Rin